you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Randomize
