The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
