; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
