he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
A bitchslap is in order.
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