what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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