so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
