i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Randomize