If that was your dad, he is hot
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
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