He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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