If that was your dad, he is hot
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I am one with the molecules
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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