Whod you bang
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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