I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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