NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
