Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize