you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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