Whod you bang
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
