oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
