what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Randomize
