i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize