My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
