He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize