She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
