you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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