u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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