You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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