I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Randomize
