Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
