hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I'm at about main and main street
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
