People in love make me want to vomit
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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