I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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