areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
