your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
