well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
