You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
