so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize