yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize