You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize