he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize