I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
