Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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