I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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