well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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