So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
i drank out of a bidet.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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