Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
