idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
