Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
