David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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