i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
It was like giving head to a cactus.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
