Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
