Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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