Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
