Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
