Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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